Three Things I Practice In Real Life

The Illuminati emailed me and warned that I was out of the club if I didn’t add one more blog post to complete my one blog post per month self-made contract (referenced in my goals for 2022 in my 2021 Review) . So here it is. Three things I practice in my real life to complete my commitment. Enjoy, you sexy bastards.

1. The liquid that I consume the most is water. Whatever. I know it’s contrary to popular belief. Yes I party selectively, because I believe wholeheartedly that God placed all things on this earth for us to enjoy on occasion. One of my mottos is “Experience everything; be mastered by nothing.” Anyway, proper hydration is an essential element of a whole host of bodily functions. Dr. Andy Galpin (I discovered him via Dr. Andrew Huberman’s podcast) reports, through his lab studies, a very simple equation for adequate hydration; and no, it’s not two fucking gallons of water per day (like so many other medical inaccuracies accepted as truth for decades because they were invented by rigid old white dudes). Anyway, the new data says around half of your body weight in ounces per day. So if you weigh 200 lbs, your water intake would be 100 oz per day. It works for me. Oh yeah, don’t forget to add electrolytes for balance. Also oh yeah, this could change. Stop trying to make medicine concrete. It flows. It adapts. Deal.

2. I don’t check my phone when I wake in the morning. This is another tip from Dr. Andrew Huberman (seriously, if you don’t know him, look him up). Basically, Huberman has discovered that we’re completely screwing the poodle on our dopamine levels in this era of instant gratification. Almost any damn thing you want in this world can be at your fingertips in minutes, and this is royally screwing with our baseline dopamine levels. So anytime you scroll Insta or Snapchat or TikTok, or check your texts, or look at your photos, or swipe dating apps, you’re steadily chipping away at your baseline dopamine level. Our brains are losing their abilities to enjoy a simple fucking sunset, or five minutes of unstimulated silence. Huberman reports (and with good reason) that checking your phone first thing in the morning immediately begins to tap into your dopamine storage. So you’re copulating with yourself for the rest of the day by starting in a dopamine deficit. I wake, step into a cold shower if I’m super groggy or hungover, have a small snack, workout, and have breakfast. Then I check my phone for anything important and head to work.

3. I ALWAYS keep something to look forward to in my near future (one to two months out). It could be a surfing trip, travel, a cruise, a social event, family visitation, a concert, a comedy show, etc. Whenever internal motivation fails me (and it absolutely will for everyone at times), having a delightful and exciting future to live into will assist in driving you on days when you’re feeling less than stellar. So start throwing some shit on that dry ass calendar. Below is my real life November calendar (blurred to protect Ms. A; I assume she desires anonymity for her sketchy and ghostly antics). I’ve heard it said that a busy life is a powerful one, and I can damn sure concur.